Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Skimpy-clothed athletes and drama? Must be the Summer Olympics!

I cannot take my eyes off everything Summer Olympics London 2012.  It’s terrible.  I’m losing sleep.  I can’t focus on anything else.  I’m suddenly so worried about people I’ve never met and, in most cases, never knew existed before this week.  Will they win gold?  Will they have a spectacular wipe out?  Will their parents sitting in the stands survive the angst of watching their kid perform?  Will they have a “wardrobe malfunction”?     

Worst of all, I’ve adopted a sports commentator voice in my head whenever I attempt to accomplish any mundane task:  “If anyone can empty the dishwasher in world record time, it’s Audry Fryer.  Four years ago in Beijing, she missed the qualifiers by one hundredth of a tenth of a second.  The pressure’s on and this is her time to make Olympic history.  And, she’s off!  Oh, that’s going to be a deduction but she can make it up here if she sticks the landing …”   

Is it the skimpy-clothed athletes?  Is it the drama, the tears of joy and the weeping of defeat?  Is it the fact that I prefer to watch other people push their bodies to the extreme while I kick back on the couch with a bowl of ice cream?  Perhaps.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must go watch a sport I’ve never cared about before today.  I’ll send you back to Bob Costas: “There you have it, another solid performance by blogger Audry Fryer.  Last week’s post about Fifty Shades of Grey collected over a hundred pageviews.  We’re still awaiting the results for this post.  Stay tuned.”

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