What the “Ho-Ho-Ho” were you thinking???

from the movie, "The Christmas Story"

Every year I say the same thing, “Yea! It’s the holiday season.  Play the Christmas music! Break out the decorations! Let’s shop!  Let’s bake and drink and be merry!”

 I love it …  I hate it!  Why is most Christmas music so annoying – stop yelling at me in song that it’s “the most wonderful time of the year”!  And shopping – the pressure of expressing my love and affection for people through a personalized travel mug or something equally unnecessary that makes the gift receiver ask, “What the Ho-Ho-Ho were you thinking?” And, who has time to bake when I can’t decide what to buy and who has the best sale prices!  Of course, there’s always time to drink – and be horribly hung over while listening to obnoxiously loud Christmas music! 

Oh the guilt of hating it – Actually, yes, I do love it!  Family memories and traditions and the “there’s always next year to buy you something better” mentality and the children and, oh yeah, all that religious stuff, of course – the true meaning of Christmas…

Three phrases that sum up Christmas are: Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, and Batteries not Included.

English Proverb 

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.         
Bernard Manning 

There are some people who want to throw their arms round you simply because it is Christmas; there are other people who want to strangle you simply because it is Christmas. 
Robert Staughton Lynd 
 

Our children await Christmas presents like politicians getting in election returns: there's the Uncle Fred precinct and the Aunt Ruth district still to come in. 
Marcelene Cox 

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice."

Dave Barry, humor columnist

Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer.... Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously?

Bill Watterson, cartoonist and creator of Calvin and Hobbes 

That awkward moment when Santa has the same wrapping paper as your mom.

Anonymous

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.

 Joan Rivers quotes  

What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. 
Phyllis Diller 

Let's be naughty and save Santa the trip. 
Gary Allan 

Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log. 
Ellen DeGeneres 

And finally, a nice quote to put all the madness into perspective:

As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December's bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same.

Donald E. Westlake, crime fiction writer

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/topics/topic_christmas2.html#GG2fvubLO5RW0EVd.99